Dear Intelligent Advice: Lost and Delirious

Dear Intelligent Advice,

         I am a 16-year-old girl and have began to notice that unlike my friends who are interested and obsessed with men, I am more fascinated by women. What should I do? I don’t really want people to think of me as a lesbian forever.

Sincerely,

Lost and Delirious

Response: [Adviser logged on Lez4lyfWoolf]:

Dear Lost and Delirious,

I will share a secret with you, I learned this secret when I was very young and it is implanted in my mind as an essential part of my childhood along with the green grass and stretching elm trees of our garden; the secret sounds at first like a curse and a burden but upon closer inspection it is a freedom and a gift. The secret simply put is this; women do not matter. Society does not give a damn about us, we are but frivolous beings floating around on the edge of a man’s world.

Because we matter so little we can be stuck into little pre-made boxes; wife, mother, nurse, daughter, and if you don’t realize it you fall imperceptibly into your little box and there your whole life is lived.

But if you are a great mind, which we should all strive to be, limitations permitting, you take strength in your own meaninglessness. You realize you have a secret power in your obscurity, if you do not matter to society, then society doesn’t have to matter to you.

I wrote one of the masterworks of the 20th Century and most men still think it is just a book about a house party. I loved a woman my whole life and men think I had sex with my husband and was a good, dutiful wife. It is amazing the things you can accomplish when no one expects great things from you; when no one expects anything at all.

So live your life daringly, live life as if you were as meaningless as the dew that remains on grass through the morning and dries off by afternoon; if you love women instead of men love them as passionately and freely as you wish and don’t give a damn what anyone says. Answer only to the noise in your own brain.

Sincerely,

Postmodernproblemsolver

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